How I Map Out My Desires Like Danielle Laporte

Desire Map Course with Danielle LaPorte

Mapping out desires means knowing what you want. For too long, too many of us have moved through our lives without a clear idea of what we want from life, leading us into unhappy relationships and unsuccessful ventures. I map out my desires to ensure that I am pouring my energy into the things and people I know will bring me the satisfaction I need. This allows me to have a greater perspective on life through both the highs and the lows, because I know I can always put a plan into motion that will bring me closer to my desires.

When we set out to satisfy a desire or reach a goal, we need to establish modest achievable steps to help us get there, but we should also remember that the end state is not the only reward. The journey itself can be powerful if we can cut through the extra noise and focus on what we truly need.

Declare Your Refusal.
You first need to identify what isn’t working, what you’re willing to change and express that. Keep it simple and don’t allow yourself to get mired down in disgrace, blame, or rationalizing. This becomes your sacred, infallible “No.”

Certify Your “Holy Yes.”
It is equally important to focus on and highlight things that ARE working. Acknowledging the things that are going well delivers you to a place of appreciation and encourages you to seek more of what you need.

Find It Inside of You.
Once you have identified and declared your core sentiments (your “Sacred No” and “Holy Yes”) resist the temptation to mull over it in your mind. The real work is in striving to feel this in every segment of your body. Does your core feeling allow you to be open and sure? Do you encounter your Sacred No through muscle withdrawals, inconsistent breathing, nervousness, or warmth in your body? Does your Holy Yes impart a profound feeling of peace, euphoria, adaptability, and relaxation? The body knows before the brain does. The more we can make that mind-body association—“This is what that ‘Yes’ feels like,” or “This is what that ‘No’ feels like”—the less our mind works to judge, dissect, or make sense of things. You simply begin trusting your body to reveal to you what feels right and what doesn’t.

Learn to Replace “No” with “Yes.”
Eventually, you will be able to extract yourself from a “no” condition to a “yes” condition with “go-to” activities or exercises that consistently meet your “Holy Yes” needs. Make a list of simple things that facilitate your desired center
emotions and that you can reach for at a moment’s notice. My personal list includes a shower with coconut oil, a splurge on a fancy drink, an extra chapter in my book before bed, or volunteer activities. They are simple ways to satisfy the center emotions I need to feel to thrive.

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